I am having one of those endless days. I just feels like no matter what happens the day doesn't seem to end . I woke this morning after dreaming that my dad told me he was tired of me and didn't want me anymore...he had given up on trying to help me. I had become a burden. I wish that those type of dreams wouldn't happen they really shake me up and put me in a funk. Lunch is not sitting well not to mention I am having personal physical pain in another place.
I guess my self essteem is down . I feel gross and contagous. I feel like my nerves are pretty much peaked. My parents here in wisconsin are finally being supportive but now they are being nice and my mom has been crying a lot. I hate to admit it but I think it was easier for me when they were angry. I felt like it was easy at that point right now they are showing me love and understanding ..something I constantly am craving in my corner. With my family in va that is a constant. there is never a day without that reminder and words of love even if only in passing. It might take me a while to adjust to receiving that kind of love but I can't think of a better thing to get better about.
At work today I have been awesome about being productive. I have been making project after project with the clients. Today D is sick so I really took charge and led a bunch of stuff earlier. My boss J smiled and is like you sure gotta leave in april you are one of the best staff we have ever had.
Can't lie that brought my mood up a crap ton. I feel like I did something right. I love working with people I hope wherever I go in va I can do something silmilar.
Happy thoughts going out to my sick dad. I hope he feels better! Gahhh I just am missing my family sooo terribly!
Ohhyeah for those keeping up I forgot to mention I am moving to VA....so nervous. Excited...and overall happy
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